It was bound to happen

I'm really feeling inadequate. I'm having a hard time in this 'boss' role, especially when the big boss, master left it at... "I'm the silent partner." So, these 3 masters still really make me feel like I don't know what I"m doing. And, they're right, in a way. I'm new at this 'boss' business. As far as being a competent martial artist.... I'm completely confident that I'm as good as or better than them in the technical aspect... heck, i"m 20+ years their junior so I can kick higher, and I still remember my forms. Just a little side note from the test this past weekend.... Ya, I was pretty unimpressed with their performance. Sure, they have eons more teaching experience than I do... they've been doing the sport the entire time I've been alive.... but, wow, I was expecting more. Hmm. I guess, as the technical, do-ability, I feel I'm every bit as good... oh, but I repeat myself. So, why do they make me feel like such a pee-on? Or is that Peon?!
Sure, I'm not doing things exactly the same way the grand master did... Like, I'm cleaning up the supply cabinet. I've pulled out all 100+, random color belts that were just taking up valuable realestate. I bring the belts over for the students who passed their test and clearly state in the bright, red notebook on the desk... yes, that one with the, "INSTRUCTORS, READ DAILY!!!" noted on the front in black, bold marker... yes, that one. I clearly instructed not to hand out belts until the following Monday. Well, now, I'm not only missing belts today.... not only did they hand them out early, when I told them not to, they didn't check belt sizes so now I do not have the right ones for the right kids.... GRRRRR And then, they're too above answering emails or even bothering to read them. This one teacher, ya, the same one that's been a pain since the get-go, decided he'd disregard my new attendance sheet.... scribble on it and do it his way. Then he took off another important paper that I explained in my lowly email... he took it off the table, and decided to make up his own half-assed list for another matter. AAAAAARRRRRRGGGGGG. Ya, so I probably came off as a bitch on the phone to him this afternoon... but, damn it, I was steamed.... his stupid response, "well, I didn't understand it"... then I threw back, well it is very clearly stated what is needed on that chart for the people to fill in... and if you had bothered to read your email I also explained it there. *RRRGGGH* I was just telling Kurt, "why does he piss me off? Doesn't he have a woman at home and know what not to do???" I just get a laugh in response! This is really becomming a pain. You know, I spell it out... I send out emails... yet, somehow, I'm being ignored. And it's really starting to piss me off.

Had another interesting information bit told to me this evening by one of the parents.... seems a nasty rumor is spreading 'round cowtown that the grand master is retiring... well, true.... and that his school is going out of business... and not to buy uniforms from him anymore. This from one of our former/current student that runs the program through the park district....He used to associate himself with our school back when the grand master was running it... shoot, now it's just Kurt and me.... seems he finds it below himself to continue on this association with us since we're now running the show and has been passing the word on to his students and parents. Nice. How come he didn't have the balls to tell me in person?

I swear, it was all fun and giggles when I was the only girl in the bar after the test... hanging with all the boys. Fun times. Hmmm, seems some of the boys don't play so nicely when girls are around. I'm finding it can be a pain with these same guys in the group. What? don't they take me seriously? Seems the master I was paired up with while free fighting at our test on Saturday ought to take me seriously. Kurt tells me he was shocked to see his wife fighting so good. Damn, that was nice to hear!! Ok, I felt really on my game while sparring this guy, and sparring the other woman I was paired with first. Ya, he was probably taking it a bit easy with me, being a girl and all... but I still felt evenly matched for most of the fight. Sure I took one glove in my face...my fault though, I dropped my block. But, I think that's when it sank in that it doesn't hurt to get hit... and I laid into him.... payback time. And you know, come to think of it... I was going easy on him too... I didn't land my kick to his unblocked head... twice. Nor did I hit him in the face at least 2 times that I took the opening. I put my glove in there.... or my foot up to his head and pulled it back. He knew I was in, I knew I scored. That's really how the game is played. It's not about trying to really knock the other guy out. You know when you've let your guard down.
Ok... that's enough of that rant.... I think I"m just spinning.... let's see some pictures from the fun Saturday test.... where Kurt broke 10 inches of solid concrete with his hand! And, I broke 4 inches of solid concrete with my hand... although you'll have to take my word for it.... middle K just caught me, from my wide hips down, looking over a heap of broken concrete. You can't see a face at all... sigh.... but, just ask anyone who was there... I did it!